The Story of My Miracle Baby

“Okay, ma’am, I have your discharge papers right here. I think I’m going to check you one more time before you go though.” The nurse that spoke those words to me 19 years and 2 days ago saved my life and the life of my son whose birthday it is today. God used her among many others in some amazing ways to allow my son to celebrate his 19th birthday today. You see, that day, I was in the hospital, 35 weeks pregnant with my second son experiencing pre-term labor. I had been through pre-term labor with my first pregnancy starting at 27 weeks, but it was managed with rest and medication until I safely delivered at 37 weeks. But this pregnancy had been different. I was measuring way larger than normal which they eventually figured out was due to an excessive amount of amniotic fluid. The picture below shows me at 32 weeks yet I look overdue!

They told me that this could be a symptom of hydrocephalus. It was very scary news to hear from doctors but I just continued to keep praying for my healthy baby and hope for the best. Eventually, the amount of amniotic fluid caused my body to think it was time to go into labor, so into labor I went. When I went to the hospital March 9, 1996,  they decided to check my dilation and watch my contractions on the monitors for a couple of hours. Although I was contracting, initially I didn’t seem to be progressing in dilation, so they were preparing to discharge me and send me on my way. Thankfully, that nurse decided to check me one more time. I had progressed from 2cm to 3cm dilation in the last hour.  My son and I would not have survived if we had been sent home that day. What made it such a lifesaving event was that I lived about 30 minutes from the nearest hospital and I was about to suffer a placental abruption.  After spending two days on magnesium sulfate to try stop the labor unsuccessfully, my water broke. When it had stopped flowing for the most part, I suddenly felt a sharp pain and more fluid. As soon as I alerted a nurse who checked me everything in my hospital room changed. Everyone started moving faster, I was laid down flat and wheeled down the hall to the operating room. I remember being so cold and shaking and asking them how long it would be before they put me out.  That was the last thing I remember until waking up to tell my son goodbye. I didn’t know if I would ever see him alive again.

He was in an incubator hooked up to all sorts of wires and tubes and getting ready to be flown on a helicopter to a larger hospital who could figure out what was wrong with him and help him stay alive.  What I learned later on was that my son’s Apgar scores at 1 and 5 minutes were 1 and 2. He was pretty much barely alive when he was born. He was not breathing, he was limp and gray but he did have a pulse. The doctors notes state that the anesthesiologist was unable to intubate him.  I am so thankful for his pediatrician, Dr. Susan Bullard, for saving his life by forcing that ET tube into him that provided him the oxygen he so desperately needed. It would be a few days later that we would learn why he had been so difficult to intubate and his difficult prognosis.

So roughly 36 hours after my emergency C-section where I was cut from the belly button down, my mom drove my 16-month old son, Nicholas and I to Tulsa, Oklahoma after stopping by my house to collect a few days worth of clothes and supplies for what we thought would be a short, couple of days stay before we brought baby Blake home from the hospital. I definitely think that my optimism was a gift from God to shield me from the fear that would have overtaken me had I known what lay ahead.  After  arriving at the hospital NICU and getting all scrubbed up, I finally got to see Blake again. I just sat by his bed, stroking his soft, baby skin while talking and singing to him while intermittently silently praying that God would heal him. I prayed Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, ” plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.”  I also remembered the verse that my sister had sent me on a card that said, ” Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding”, which is found in Proverbs 3:5. I vividly remember my conversation with the Lord, asking Him to spare Blake’s life and allow me to raise him, but conceding fully to His will even if He was going to take him home to heaven. When I think back on this time, I find so amazing the amount of peace that God gave me, without me even having the words to ask. It would be the first of several times where I would look back and realize that God was truly carrying me in the palm of His hand.

I finally got to hold Blake for the first time when he was 5 days old. There were definitely tears that day.  Happy tears, tears of relief and thankfulness. I spent my days in the NICU trying to fairly divide my time between my 16 month old son, whom my mom cared for in the hallways of the hospital, and caring for my fragile newborn amidst the added demand of constantly pumping milk to help Blake’s nutrition eventually, even though he wasn’t allowed to eat yet.

Over the next 56 days of his stay, he had multiple bronchoscopy procedures that determined he had a fluid-filled cyst in his trachea that completely blocked his airway. This had also affected his swallowing and processing the amniotic fluid which had to led to the excess amount that caused his early arrival.  The cyst had been the reason that the anesthesiologist had been unable to intubate him and  had actually been popped by his pediatrician which had resulted in successfully saving his life but also made it harder for them to diagnose his condition initially.  The cyst was rapidly regenerating every time they went in and tried to excise it. They also did an EEG which they said showed abnormalities that could mean severe mental problems or slight learning disabilities but they just didn’t know enough to say for sure. Totally not helpful, whatsoever. One night the hospital called to say that they needed me to come back up to the hospital because Blake wasn’t doing well and they weren’t sure if he was going to make it. They thought he might have meningitis and needed to perform a spinal tap. It came back negative, thankfully.  I just took it in stride, not really believing all the bad things the doctors kept telling me but knowing that whatever God gave me He would help me through it.

Blake slowly started doing a bit better and they moved him to the “closer to going home” side of the room. He was no longer intubated but still struggled to breathe effectively, especially while eating which prevented him from gaining much weight. Unfortunately, they placed a baby next to Blake which they shortly thereafter discovered had RSV. He caught it which reversed all of the progress he had made. His neonatologist and pediatric surgeon made the determination that he needed to undergo two life-altering procedures: a feeding tube and a tracheostomy. This was very hard to hear because they seemed so permanent and I had so many questions but ultimately I trusted God to guide the doctors to do what was best for him.

He came through both procedures perfectly and thrived afterward. He started gaining weight more rapidly and was soon ready to go home. I wanted to get him home so badly, but again, my optimism helped me ignore the reality that was going to be my life of taking care of my eighteen month old son while trying my best to also meet the special needs of Blake. He was almost 2 months old when he was discharged from the hospital and he weighed 5 lbs. I was pumping milk nonstop it seemed, feeding him regularly through his feeding tube while also still trying to teach him how to nurse so he would continue to gain weight.  I had to suction mucous out of his tracheostomy  tube every 5 minutes so he could continue breathing, which was pretty important. All of this amidst the wires of the apnea monitor he had to wear in case he stopped breathing while he was sleeping. It was quite a feat going anywhere in those early months carrying all of that equipment in addition to a baby in a car seat and a toddler.

I honestly have no idea how I did it! It makes me exhausted just thinking about it now. But I was much younger back then and so thankful to have two beautiful boys at home that I just did whatever needed to be done and God gave me the strength to do it.  Blake’s smiles and joyful personality also helped.

So now, as I reflect back on this day 19 years ago, I am forever grateful for God allowing me to be Blake’s mom. I stand in utter amazement at God’s involvement in the seemingly small details of our lives that He weaves together in an amazing story of His provision and grace. There is so much more to Blake’s story than I can fit into one blog post. He had subsequent surgeries, health issues, almost died in my arms one more time at 4 months old and was life-flighted once again. He was able to have his feeding tube removed at 9 months of age. He was blessed with miracles in his speech and intellect and surpassed every test for intelligence and skills at an early age in spite of his early diagnosis of possible mental disability.

And after 4 long years of my fervent prayers, fasting and seeking God’s healing, Blake had another surgery to remove the cyst and that time, it miraculously didn’t grow back. After several months of waiting and checkups, he was finally able to get his tracheostomy tube removed. He was able to learn to swim and also to get baptized. He has gone through normal trials that most boys do with school, friends and girls but also other extraordinary trials such as our family struggling through a divorce and later, remarriage and all the challenges that step-families encounter but handled it all wonderfully, with God’s help.

What I have seen through the story of Blake’s life, is that God is so faithful. I have frequently shared with all of my children that God has a special plan for their life and this is very evident in Blake’s life. In spite of the enemy’s various attacks, Blake is a well-adjusted, intelligent, caring young man who loves Jesus with all of his heart. He is a thoughtful son and brother to his family members, a good friend to those God puts in his path and an active ambassador for Christ in the world around him. He is currently studying Biblical Theology while attending Ozark Christian College in Joplin, Missouri. He has, in recent years, served on various mission trips in the United States and abroad and is looking forward to more.  He volunteers with two-year olds at church and holds a job working with developmentally disabled people. I think he is an amazing young man and I am so thankful that God spared his life and mine so I can tell others about what an amazing God we serve and how wonderful His love is for us while telling Blake’s story.